An Interview With Masha Rumer

Author of Parenting with an Accent, 2023 Sarton Nonfiction Winner

Interview by Pat Bean

How do you raise a child to appreciate two cultures? That was what Masha Rumer, who was born in Russia and married to an American, wanted to know after her first child was born. When her research didn’t turn up an answer, Masha decided to write her own book, Parenting with an Accent, which went on to receive the Sarton Award for Nonfiction.

Masha says she knew she wanted to be a writer when she was about six years old. “I wrote and illustrated a book about an enchanted sheep in my school notebook. Obviously, it was not very virtuosic and many of the letters were missing, since the Russian alphabet has thirty-three of them.”

Masha continued writing, and after immigrating to America as a teenager turned to writing poetry, which she says helped her express herself in a new language. She then went on to earn graduate degrees in comparative literature and in communications, and has taught English composition, English as a second language, and journalism at colleges in California and New Jersey. Her writing has appeared in The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Los Angeles Times, Parents, and elsewhere, winning writing awards from the New York Press Association.

It was after she had a child to raise in her multicultural family that the questions started coming. “I suddenly experienced an intense culture shock—similar to the one I had after immigrating. I felt like an outsider all over again and struggled with the pull of both cultures at once. How do I raise my American child to appreciate both cultures and languages? How do I hold on to the positive and cherished aspects of my childhood and upbringing and leave behind what I disagree with? How do I help my kids retain the language and connect with relatives all over the world while living in an English-speaking society?

“After talking about it with other immigrant parents, no matter their culture, I realized that these are struggles we all share, even if we don't openly discuss them, since the topics of feeling like an outsider, guilt, dating as an immigrant, homesickness, cultural inbetweenness, and questions of fitting in are fraught with pain and discomfort. And yet there were no resources available to someone like me,” Masha recalls.

“After I published a shorter article about immigrant parenting and, later, my book, I received so many messages from all over the world, where people have shared how meaningful and comforting the book has been to them. I cherish every one of these letters.” Masha says when she was feeling down about her writing while balancing a day job and parenting responsibilities, she went to hear a writer she deeply admired. “After the talk, she took time to speak to me, showed genuine interest in my book idea and story, and encouraged me. I left that event feeling recharged and hopeful again. It goes to show how important it is for writers and creatives of all kinds to have community and to support one another, including paying it forward. Your kind words and encouragement can do more than you know.”

Masha says she’s continuing to work on shorter essays about immigrant identity and raising bilingual kids, and is also at work on a novel about a modern American/immigrant family. “I was immensely honored to receive the Sarton Award, especially because it celebrates women writers and our multifaceted stories and because Story Circle does so much to create and nurture a community of writers at all stages of their craft.” Masha adds: “The award process is very competitive, so it felt extremely validating to receive the news! I'm still glowing just thinking about it.”

Masha now lives in California with her family and a hamster. Visit her at her website, masharumer.com.